She –had been an habitual long-term relationship-er diving in and out, and in and out and in and out of relationships like a dolphin skidding across the water, like a sewing machine repairing a tear in clothing.
She –had been a serial short-term dater, avoiding anything that even smells too close to seriousness.
…Until she plunged into her like a cartoon jumping off of a tight rope into a cup of water.
They –never looked back, and if so, not for too long. They belonged.
Systematic desensitization
Of the human race
Race relations
Makes no sense
Non-sense
Impotent
When ignorance is potent
What’s more, important
In poor tense
Poverty
People like, “What dad ever fathered me?”
Fathering
Furthering
Fathoming
What did life ever have on me?
We think we’re less crazy
Than the people who talk to themselves
When all the time, we tell ourselves
Reasons why they deserved to be underserved
Ignored
Like it’s the norm
Why?
It’s okay to keep doing the same things as before
Not anymore.
What does it mean to be allies, in this day and age why is there still injustice left to fight?
Why to each other we must bind, gather formation in a line, pray to who you hold most divine
That our community will be alright
All rise, for allegiance to a flag we must pledge
Why does adding black and brown to the rainbow make so many people red?
Instead, we must practice what we preach
Honor differences in each other, it’s what makes us all unique
I speak, from experience of indifference within the black lesbian community
Where words can shred each other apart, instead we need to hold in unity
I act in honor of my brother who is trans
For awareness of our right to identity
You’re not entitled to tell me who I am
I am layers upon layers of minority
Dispositioned to more risks than who we call majority
Learning to love more of me
And by me I mean every one of you fam
Because injustice in the smallest of corners can spread across the whole land
It hurts too much when
The thought of you hanging out with your mistress’ mutual friends
Distresses me
Even when she is states away
Because the thought that she gets to see you again -even on Snapchat -drives me insane
Because I want to erase everything ever associated with us coming out this way
You seem all too okay
Seeing snapchats, location stamps, brands my heart
My heart burns
Like you took the smoldering stubble of the leftover cigarette
You often smoke when you’re drunk
And pushed it into my skin
Let that sink in
You, ha, you burned me
—
Away
You turned from me
Before you ever got a chance to truly learn me
Didn’t have what it took to earn me
Breaking pencils, erasers running down
Can’t you see I’m still learning
With some nerve to treat this like a test
—
I attest
You’ve been better than the rest
But can you be so good, if you’re not the one who’s next
Annexed
My heart
Leave
Like you leave scars
Yet you can’t ever go too far
When Hillcrest is the place you commonly are
—
Hillcrest
Where you commonly are
The black hole
I walked into in the dark
Where bitches are conniving
After attention like some sharks
Erasing futures from the start
I refuse to play the part
Like the fire in embers I drift,
From one source of fuel to the other
Just to stay alive
We, in a world of opiates, want immediate gratification
When the healing of pain takes time
Which is why, today, we are still addicted
