The fog

There’s a fog creeping in

A familiar feeling

One I get lost in

Yet I’m drowning

And I don’t know if I want to pull myself out

There’s a haze in my head

Kind of like the one outside right now

I sleep in it’s comfort

Because sleep is a way away from the discomfort

I let you down.

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NYE ’17

“Dying when those fireworks are going off and rejecting the New Year and life like that.

Also I can think of the fireworks as celebrating the end of my suffering.”

“You failed to bring me into your future with you

Now I’m a thing of the past”

You were the absolute concoction of my dreams

You were the manifestation of my 3rd grade runaway desires

You were my savior

And you’ve fallen

My confidence has plummeted

I no longer believe that you truly want me

I don’t think you’re bad at all

I think you care

I think you care enough to conceal the truth to not hurt me

The truth

Which is, that you’re just not that into me anymore

Or that you want to keep me around as security

While you scour for and devour other women

You were my dreams

Now my reality is a nightmare

I can dash away any hopes of having a family

Having a baby

A house

Shit having love

It’s all gone

No talks of you’ll move on

That shit doesn’t ring true for me anymore

I give up

You said you wanted to see other people, but you didn’t want me to

Your wish has come true

And while I won’t be seeing them, I also won’t be seeing you.