Washing

Stuck in a spin cycle
My life whirs past me
Objects blurring together
Like what innocent children see when they play ring around the Rosie too fast
And I fell down
Fell down after you wrapped the bend of your arm
Snugly fit into the front of my throat
Like children falling down
You felt you had the power to whisk the air away from my chest
Like children falling down
You drug me to the ground
Gripping tight to my head
I fell down, in surrender
I don’t want to be a contributing factor to a violent relationship anymore
Lines blur, between love and hate
Like what children see when spinning in circles they play
Spinning, where was I again?
Oh that’s right, stuck in spin cycle
Except my cycle began as a child
Seeing my mom pick people who purposely put hands on her
I learned,
Subconsciously perpetuating the cycle
In each person I picked, I was hit.
I was hit, and after I while I learned to hit.
And then after that while, I was done with it
Leaving me here
On the ground
I did not fight back because I did not want to be an abuser again
I am
Done with it

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