Emotional suicide

When I went to sleep tonight I prayed that I wouldn’t wake up

now here I am two hours later with a back ache and a numbed leg in this cramped car

god has a sadistic humor

no matter how hard I try to push myself out of this frame I remain entrapped

degrees, believing in love, EVERYTHING…has been for nothing.

i give up

i can’t even be strong in front of my brother any more.

the color is bleeding out of my life surroundings seeming more black than white

i am imploding

a pathetic character who attempts to save others lives when she can’t even save her own

time to hang it up.


2 thoughts on “Emotional suicide

  1. You have accomplished too much to say that it was all for nothing. Right now, you have choices. I hope that you choose what makes you happy.

  2. Dm says:

    Things may look bleak, but trust me…they get better.
    Well, you don’t have to trust me because you don’t know me and I don’t know you…but I do know that I was in the same place about a year and a half ago.
    With help from a dear friend, exercise and getting into the outdoors more…I overcame.

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