Things that Drake would say… (-_-)


Maybe I don’t write about you

Because I feel like

Nothing I say will be good enough

I’m tryna cut out anything that doesn’t seem like it’s good for us


Yea you got me there

You got me scared

Took me by surprise

I was unprepared

Facing all my fears

Cause I know you care

It’s why you’re still here


Taking a chance

Just warn me in advance

Before you break my heart


Hoping this is something that’ll work out

Despite our start


Just give me a little time love

You know I’m slow

It’s not anything a little light couldn’t help us grow

It’s not anywhere a little climb couldn’t help us go

Said I’d open up starting tonight just to let you know

Just let me know


You won’t leave me

As long as you don’t let go of my heart

Then no one else can keep me

Dinner, Greek mythology and things I’m not so sure of…


You cut me up into bits and pieces that you can swallow

Like your ceviche

I guess you love doing that to me too

But like your food

You could never diminish what you’re trying to delude

You could never shake the disgust

Because it’s all in your head

You’d rather kill us dead

Than to be worry free instead.


What are you afraid of?

Your mold of promiscuity has been cracked

And you’re not quite sure how to retain your form.


Let me stop talking

I don’t really know you enough

I haven’t fully figured you out yet

To call you out on your actions


You are Psyche’s benefaction

Cytherea released from Pandora’s box

All the best and worst things about love wrapped into one

An oxymoron

You react this way

How come?


What I do know is

You are unaccepting

Unaccepting because of the fear that I won’t do right by you


The same emotion that kills you is the emotion that drives you.

Your subliminal message decoded

When will you ever love me enough to really know me

Love is something you proclaim, but you’ve yet to show me.

You hold me, and from hello you stole me and since then you’ve been my one and only

but still you don’t feel as if you own me.

Is it because I don’t surrender enough of myself to you for your liking?

You claim to be trying, but is love really for what you’re fighting or,

is it something else?

What your lips hide, your actions tell

and giving an honest attempt is something at which you repeatedly fail.

I’ve learned to accept you for who are: a liar. and promiscuous.

And the moment I begin to turn is the moment you put into it.

Well, I want this time to be too late.

No more pretty endings to our fate,

I think me walking away leaving you in hazes of grey rain is much better.

Turning back to you is organized on my list of nevers,

and I scribbled your name at the top.

You never stop to think, until you think to stop.

Writing me excuses on why didn’t work for our fit,


You must’ve thought feelings in my body long died,

from the batteries of an abusive ex,

who would’ve guessed I’d be running to my next?

Picking me up when my confidence was low

training my heart to fit your soul

and then crushing it in similar ways…

Kissing my scars but your kisses kill,

like I’m on a deathbed, love you I will,

but will I be loved?

Love isn’t shared by pushes and shoves,

Love isn’t crushed by smothering hugs,

but you do…

I must’ve never learned how the cards work,

because I’m a queen, but I continue to play the fool.

Separation: Day 1


The Pain of loneliness that’s what I feel

I’m like Alice in Wonderland finding myself in a place so unreal

When we give it the second chance our love gets torn apart

A restraining order I never even put in for from the start?

I guess this is what’s called modern day Romeo and Juliet

Can’t they see what separations done? How could they forget?

A relationship whose basis was built on regret

And to protect our love, we used…nothing but threats

Now all this has gotten us is one single thread

The thread that we both hang from

The only way we now connect

And if it were to break I admit I must confess

While I’ve already lost half my mind trying to stay with you, I may as well lose my rest

Because you were the only love I wanted to claim as mine

Even though every time I confined to someone were fine we were always in some bind

I wish sometimes we could just leave our past behind

But I guess something’s let go and some things stay and that’s why loves stays so blind

One month of isolation from one another and after that maybe even a year?!

And I can’t take it that much longer that’s why I cry my written tears

And for one year in these four walls I will adhere

In fear, that within that year someone might move closer here

Here where you ought to be, where you once sought to be, and now I have no clue

If red is the color of our hearts then why is the love it emits so blue?

And with this many obstacles, can love still be considered true?

Because it seems there’s someone else in between me, the hill, and you

But for now I don’t care, wan to have fun? I’ll still be there

Life isn’t fair but I’ll still play the tortoise while you play the hare

Writing’s Kryptonite

I just want to get lost in you

I love every inch of your being

I want to look at things from your eyes

Because if it’s not you it’s not worth seeing

How can I begin to describe the love you have given to me

It took a minute before I realized that with you is where I want to be..


I never thought I find you

But never say never


Cupid had me looking for you in all the wrong places

Somehow you managed to come along and fill up the empty spaces

That were left in my heart.

I refuse, but I still love you…

I want to get lost

In this blank empty space

Until I’m crowded with words

And blend in until no one knows me

She’s showed me something no one’s showed me

And now you’ve figured out

You don’t like the other side of being lonely

What are you doing?

You still think you can walk back in my life when you’re ready


AND COUNTLESS “let’s take it steady’s?!”

Your tears fall heavy

Heavy like how my heart felt after you cheated on me

All of the deceit

And after convincing me you’d rather be with her

You come running back to me?!

Girl please

I used to be blind but I see the pattern

And after all of that,

Buried deep inside

I still love you

I refuse to take 10 steps back to where you reside

But I still love you

She’s different

She will not be placed on the list of people

Who were amazing

But I ended it abruptly just to give chances to my hopes that you could treat me right

I refuse!

Yet I still love you

What am I going to do

Let it play out please

It’ll all work out; love is true

Your tears reflected in mine

I try so hard, too hard not to feel anything at all

And you walk in

The darkest storm on the sunniest of days

Lord, help me please

Cause I still. Love. Her.

Racial Discrimination: from the discriminator’s perspective

Many of today’s population knows very little of the Aryan Supremacists. We seem to keep the topic at an “arms distance”. By doing so we may make wrongful assumptions and develop stereotypes. We tend to take on the perspective of the discriminated but pay very little attention to the discriminators. Such an example is present in the ever-popular Diary of Anne Frank. Black Sun, a non-fiction literature written by Nicholas Goodrick-Clark, takes on the very perspective of the discriminators. Black Sun covers every aspect, in great detail, of Aryan ideology.

            In Black Sun, Goodrick-Clarke discusses the many groups of white supremacy. One denomination of white supremacy is known as the Indo-Aryans. Indo-Aryanism embraces the principles of Hinduism. The Indo-Aryan religion adopted Hindu doctrines, which were promoted by the Indo-Aryan leader, Savitri Devi. Savitri Devi was known as the Hindu prophetess of Indo-Aryanism. Her ideas greatly influenced the neo-Nazi in the 1980’s and the 1990’s. Indo-Aryans took on the practice of Tantrism, which was more of a main focus to the Indo-Aryan leader Julius Evola. Julius Evola was a traditionalist fascist, notorious for his massacre bombing in Italy. Tantrism was all about breaking bonds. An important belief of Tantrism was not to ejaculate during intercourse. By doing so, they believe you can channel the energy of an orgasm away in order to acquire the supreme consciousness of the cosmos. Indo-Aryans also adopted the Hindu Cycle of The Ages, which in which its followers believe in the reincarnation of life on earth every 4.1 to 8.2 billion years. The reincarnation is broken down into four stages with descriptions so you can tell the current stage. Julius Evola and Savitri Devi both belief we are living in Kali Yuga, or the Dark Age, where everything is corrupt, Aryan traditions are lost, and there is cosmic imbalance.  The only way to retain cosmic balance is by insuring survival of the Aryans, who have cosmic divinity, and killing off all others. Indo-Aryans also believe in a caste system in which Aryans are placed at the top and other groups such as the Daysus, which are described as apes or slaves, are lower on the scale. They back their caste system with a tale of Ayran survival during the Ice Age in which they migrated from their Atlantic homeland to Asia, India in particular, killing off every “other” they encountered. This also explains why they derive their beliefs from Hinduism, which is mainly practiced in India where it has been said that the Aryan tradition lived the longest.

            Another type of religion is Hitlerism. People who embrace Hitlerism see Adolf Hitler, who was known for the massive slaughter of the Jews, as Messiah. A lot of influential leaders were Hitlerist. Such leaders include America’s Neo-Nazi figure, George Lincoln Rockwell, Hindu prophetess Savitri Devi, and Rockwell’s successor, Matthew Koehl. Part of Rockwell’s practice was to praise his homemade Hitler shrine. Matthew Koehl stated Hitler was Messiah, the Nazi chiefs where his disciples and the war was Hitler’s crucifixion. Savitri Devi contributed to Hitlerism by making a Hitler version of the Lord’s Prayer. Many believed in the Second Coming of Hitler, which is supported by his passage, which says when all war breaks out against the enemy he will return. People believed Hitler attained the power many sought and that he was possessed by a demon. His best friend gave his report of a turning point in which Hitler was never the same again. All other religions were fashioned after Hitler. He was the first major figure to stand up for Aryan power. Hitlerists visit his homeland to stand on “holy” ground in wishes to attain some magical power. People of this religion encourage war in hopes of his return.

            Besides Nazi’s in Germany, Neo-Nazism is the other form of white power most American’s know. From KKK’s to Black Metal, all are sub diversions are neo-Nazis’. George Lincoln Rockwell was known as the founding father of neo Nazism. He established many groups including WUNS (World Union National Socialists) and published many periodicals promoting the Savitri Devi, Hitler, and the Jewish conspiracy. His organizations performed many violent acts including bombing a synagogue, and he even rewarded a member for punching Martin Luther King Jr. in the face. After threats were posed to him and his associates his family and major organization funder deserted him. It was after this in which he began to perform insane acts such as making a Hitler altar and praising it. According to Clarke, the uprising of the American Neo-Nazis was a direct result of the immigration of minorities to America after the Civil War. Immigrants migrating to America made whites feel as if their territory was being taken over. When typically “white” jobs started being occupied by other races they began to feel unstable. In result, they began to cluster together into hate groups in an attempt to solve their identity crisis through, what they defined as self-defense. In addition, they adopted the Germans suspicions of Jews and their New World Order. The Jewish conspiracy book, The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, aided as concrete evidence to their beliefs. They looked to Hitler’s ways as a guideline to ensure their identity and racial survival. Hitler Cults formed in which Nazi symbols were sported and the signature Hitler wave was used. The most violent of Neo-Nazis were known to be the Black Metal groups and the skinheads. Black metal groups wrote songs of hate and even so, this is one major way racism was projected to the masses through the media. Both of these groups’ goals were only one thing, to kill all other races.

            The next two groups of white power are one in the same yet different at the same time. These groups are defined as the Christian Nazis and the Nazi Satanists. Christian Nazis were said to have developed as a result of affirmative action towards Nazi political groups. The jailing and punishment of Nazi extremists backed some into conforming to an acceptable practice of religion. The acceptance of diverse cultures in the U.S. made them feel embattled and in reaction these Christian Nazis marginalized themselves. The Christian Nazi religion is built on basic Christian principles underpinned with racial theology of white identity and supremacy. They believe they are Gods kinsmen sent to earth to rule. They also believe that the Bible is their Aryan history book. These religious churches are the center of isolated and hidden communities in the U.S. Communities for whites only and are fenced off. Nazi Satanists on the other hand, is said to be the extreme revival of cultic fascism. Major leaders of Nazi Satanism were Timothy LaVey and Michael A. Aquino. Aquino and LaVey had very different beliefs in Satanism. LaVey saw Satanism as a symbol of a man’s egoism. However, Aquino believed in a real objective Satan. Aquino eventually led a major rebellion against LaVey. People backed their Satanism by the Book of Satan, which is said to have a “survival of the fittest” Social Darwinist influence. In the 1970’s, members of these Satanist churches grew vastly. Between 1967 and 1970 the church population was reported to have grown by two thousand people. Major tools used in this religion were pentagons, black candles, and spells. Like all other Aryan denominations, Nazi Satanism believes in the Jew conspiracy and their plan for a New World Order. Their main goal was to murder in hopes of ushering in a new aeon of imperialism. David Myatt was a big influence in recruiting Nazi Satanists through his publishing’s throughout the 1990’s.

            Throughout Black Sun, all of these groups contain myths and conspiracies, which guided the Aryan groups’ actions. A whole chapter is even dedicated to Nazi myths. The popular myth that divine demonic forces possessed Hitler led many to idolize him as the Messiah. A former friend reporting his turning point in which Hitler’s face grew pale and he dropped his once-favored artwork and began isolating himself. He said it was as if it was not him anymore, as if someone took a hold of his body. Others claimed Hitler once possessed the Spear of Destiny, the spear that stabbed Jesus’ side. It is said that whoever possesses is has the power to control the world. Another popular myth was that Nazis have a secret connection with a hidden solar system known as Aldebaran and that the black sun of that solar system feeds Aryans their superior power. The invention of UFO’s proved this myth even further. Circa 1950, people began to report sightings of UFO’s. The UFO’s connections to the Nazis came when a German engineer reported that he constructed a blueprint for an aircraft exactly like the ones being sighted. However, his blueprint got into the hands of someone else when he ditched his work because of an invasion in Germany. From there Russians got hold of his doings and carried out his work claiming it as theirs. Majority of the populations was led to believe that UFO’s were proof that Nazi powers were real. The media influenced their belief with the massive publishing of sci-fi books based on UFO’s and Nazi connections. The most popular Nazi sci-fi publisher was William Landig. He and many others even went on search parties to find these UFO’s that were rumored to be hidden in secret societies such as Antarctica. It was concluded that Nazis had to have advanced technology in order to construct something so ahead of their time. This advanced knowledge proved their superiority and also led many to construe that Nazis had secret connections with the aliens of Aldebaran. Also, in order to harbor something so huge with it going unnoticed, they had to have a secret society, underground in the Atlantic. The Atlantic was always known as the homeland of the Aryans as expressed in the Indo-Aryan tales of the Ice Age. The invention of these UFO’s only provided even more concrete evidence of Nazi theorists. Nazis concluded that only an advanced superhuman race could invent such a thing at a time when technology was not advanced enough to do so.  UFO mythology even identifies Germans as the master race. The main factor driving Nazis against the Jews was the Jew conspiracy theory that they have planned to take over the world and force a New World Order. This belief was mainly derived from The Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Believers claim that Jews are secretly running the U.S. government, which is why equal rights were enacted, as well as other historical occurrences. To Nazis everywhere, Jews have the notoriety of being the “Spawn of Satan”.

            From my point of view, Nazism’s main cause was their identity crisis paired with their paranoia. Nazis developed insane beliefs, which have become deeply rooted in their society. This is especially evident during the post-war era. After the civil war many immigrants poured into predominately white areas causing confusion and surprise. The majority of the population felt invaded and marginalized, especially when immigrants began to occupy their jobs. These people were not used to change and therefore became resistant. I believe their superegos were dominating their personality and, in turn, they felt justified in carrying out their violent acts. Aryans around the world banded together forming Aryan denominations with similar goals but different ways of achieving them based on their cultural background. In attempt to protect their territory and ward off the unwanted, they responded in extreme measures and expressing the significance importance of their race. They used basic ideas from their leading examples, Adolf Hitler and Savitri Devi. A major basic belief was the caste system, which placed Aryans at the top. They used Darwinism and their Ice Age theory to prove their superiority. So many ideas were fashioned after Hitler, their first major active leader to defend the Aryan race. People began to see him as righteous and divine, along with his self-expression that he was the chosen one. The main drive of Nazism was to exterminate all other races. Jews had priority in this exterminating process because of the increasing power they were gaining over the world. The paranoia of such Nazi conspiracy myths gave way to even more myths such as underground worlds, cosmic power, and Hitler’s resurrection. Paranoia drove Nazis main leaders to insanity whose outlets were Satanism and absurd acts. I believe Hitler was mentally ill yet genius enough to influence the masses. He became paranoid which led him to lash out violently against invisible enemies in order to ensure his protection. He even saw himself as God so eventually he would turn against all thinking he was the only divine one. Others wanting to maintain Aryan progression saw Hitler’s fight for the Aryan race and modeled this insanity by performing rash acts, such as bombing synagogues and performing black magic.

            All in all, I believe Black Sun was an extremely informative book. It helped me become familiar with why Nazis and other denominations carry out their acts but also puts me in their shoes. By reading this book I am able to draw conclusions about the Aryan Supremacists, but not only that, but able to back my opinions with the known facts I would have not come to know without reading Black Sun. My only wish would be that the other not go into great detail about minor figures and the many different periodical, which I found insignificant, and confused me about the overall point of some chapters a bit. I would recommend this book to anyone who doesn’t agree with white supremacists, from those strongly opposing them to even mildly opposing them. My only suggestion would be to enter it with an open mind and let your knowledge of races diminish, yet, like a participant observation study, know your limits. By reading this book I took on the sociological perspective by keeping an open mind, ridding of my bias, and taking on the perspective of the marginalized.